When I got engaged, a lot of people made jokes, "So when are you going to marry your future ex-husband?" on the assumption that we were too young to get married. We married when he was 26 and I was 21. We both had stable careers (military) and it was important for us to seal the deal to be sure we would get stationed together. We've been married almost 5 years and been together for almost 6...and known each other for 7 years, and we're completely happy. That's not the case for everyone, though. I think it's important for people to have a stable situation while solo before jumping into more complex situations. For some people, that is right after high school, for others, it may be after graduate school or something. Mid 20s is probably the average...
I answered more towards what I thought might be a better age for marriage, simply because I think more highly of moving out when your younger than getting married when you're younger- but, I know it really depends on the relationship. And... I was happy not to get married for the first 10 years of my realtionship with my now husband (mostly because I -and he, I suppose- didn't see why/how that act would change how much we loved each other and I felt that us being together was nobody's business but our own,) so ...I don't know how normal my opinion could be considered) I also didn't want a wedding ceremony- I wanted to save money for a house. Our "reception" was just going to a coffee house together and then stopping by my mom's to let her know... and I've also never wanted kids so the "family planing" was never a consideration. heh. I just get more and more weird.
Besides the financial part, I second metallicmagic1989
Saving your money for the house you got was a good choice in my opinion. It's beautiful! I am beginning to think that my long term boyfriend and I should just skip some of the traditional things *engagement ring, parties, etc* because we're pretty much already set on getting married, just lacking life experiences, good jobs, and diplomas. However, we both still have a long ass way to go before things really begin to fall into place.
Rule of Thumb: -Financially stabilize home for parents and make them happy -Get good education and help them out until then with chores and such, -Get a good job and move out but keep good contact with parents.
Now there is the dorm issue thing, but I don't think that should count as I'd say or assume during weekends usually you'd visit and or stay with folks at that time.
As for Marriage, I'd say somewhere in your early-to-mid 20's. The earlier the better though. I mean you don't want to hold off until you're incapable or have enormous difficulty having children right? (lol... I hope it's not come to an insult to anyone; just saying) ~ Also, Marriage is also about having someone to help you complete yourself and a person who will be there for you besides for all types of support. So you should have an overall experience with the person you choose.
My Grandparents married reaaally young. My grandma was 14 when she married my grandpa and they lived happily until my grandpa breathed his last breath. And she still misses him and all, including me <so awesome he was>
I'm 21, been engaged for almost a year, but I still live with my parents for the reason of not having the job to have the money that is required in order to move out and live on my own.
I also don't believe in living together unmarried, and I am NOT living with my fiance's mom. No chance.
BUT, if we did have jobs and money, we'd be married as of this month. 'Sides, my own parents got married when they were 18 and 20 years old, and they're still together 23 years in.
If you're into big plans when you're older, like retiring and living just the two of you, getting married young isn't a terrible idea. You just need to have stable income and a place to stay, plus really, REALLY know this is the person you want to spend the rest of your life with.
If you'd rather live your youth and be successful young and spend time just the two of you early on, then wait a bit, at least until you're mid to late 20's, early 30's and then get hitched. It all depends on the people and how they plan to live their life together.
Also, don't forget to keep in mind that some things you still can do even when you're married. You can still go to school, still supercharge your career, still be successful, also depending on the time and place for children should you want any (I know I do at least X3 )
There are a lot of factors to consider, and how they are going to fit into your life, and how YOU are going to fit in the lives of others all need to be taken into account before big decisions like that are made
To get married when you're 18-20 is abit too early, in my opinion. Its a more "moving out age" for me Marriage is something you should take over time, get to know the one you're dating and so on. To date a year and then get married feels like a too short time (at least for me).. Then if you're 21 or 35 doesnt matter, just dont rush and I think it will be best. But thats what I think But it also depends on when you meet that significant one..
I moved out when I was 20. and started a family when I was ~22 (lol can you call it that?) I'm still not married and dont feel like its a must either. As long as my boyfriend/fiancee and I are happy I'm satisfied with my situation.
Devious Comments
My ideal age for mairrage is 25-30.
Besides the financial part, I second metallicmagic1989
I am beginning to think that my long term boyfriend and I should just skip some of the traditional things *engagement ring, parties, etc* because we're pretty much already set on getting married, just lacking life experiences, good jobs, and diplomas.
However, we both still have a long ass way to go before things really begin to fall into place.
-Financially stabilize home for parents and make them happy
-Get good education and help them out until then with chores and such,
-Get a good job and move out but keep good contact with parents.
Now there is the dorm issue thing, but I don't think that should count as I'd say or assume during weekends usually you'd visit and or stay with folks at that time.
As for Marriage,
I'd say somewhere in your early-to-mid 20's. The earlier the better though. I mean you don't want to hold off until you're incapable or have enormous difficulty having children right? (lol... I hope it's not come to an insult to anyone; just saying) ~ Also, Marriage is also about having someone to help you complete yourself and a person who will be there for you besides for all types of support. So you should have an overall experience with the person you choose.
My Grandparents married reaaally young. My grandma was 14 when she married my grandpa and they lived happily until my grandpa breathed his last breath. And she still misses him and all, including me
I also don't believe in living together unmarried, and I am NOT living with my fiance's mom. No chance.
BUT, if we did have jobs and money, we'd be married as of this month. 'Sides, my own parents got married when they were 18 and 20 years old, and they're still together 23 years in.
If you're into big plans when you're older, like retiring and living just the two of you, getting married young isn't a terrible idea. You just need to have stable income and a place to stay, plus really, REALLY know this is the person you want to spend the rest of your life with.
If you'd rather live your youth and be successful young and spend time just the two of you early on, then wait a bit, at least until you're mid to late 20's, early 30's and then get hitched. It all depends on the people and how they plan to live their life together.
Also, don't forget to keep in mind that some things you still can do even when you're married. You can still go to school, still supercharge your career, still be successful, also depending on the time and place for children should you want any (I know I do at least X3 )
There are a lot of factors to consider, and how they are going to fit into your life, and how YOU are going to fit in the lives of others all need to be taken into account before big decisions like that are made
Its a more "moving out age" for me
Marriage is something you should take over time, get to know the one you're dating and so on. To date a year and then get married feels like a too short time (at least for me)..
Then if you're 21 or 35 doesnt matter, just dont rush and I think it will be best. But thats what I think
I moved out when I was 20. and started a family when I was ~22 (lol can you call it that?)
I'm still not married and dont feel like its a must either. As long as my boyfriend/fiancee and I are happy I'm satisfied with my situation.