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January 5, 2011
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  • Listening to: "Waiting for the End" Linkin Park
  • Reading: The Sharing Knife: Horizon
  • Playing: Ocarina of Time
  • Eating: breakfast shiz
  • Drinking: CAWFEEE
Well it feels like I can breathe again.
My life got reset again, I said goodbye to someone who I thought was going to be my best bud/love interest, but he ended up playing me in the end and stabbed me in the back. Great guy huh?
Anyway, John and I are talking again, it was really foolish of me to have broken up with him, he's really worth it and I didn't realize it until he was really gone. He is being cautious and I honestly don't blame him, he has every right to be like that.

Another thing I'm beginning to realize is how many things that I took for granted and what I'm thankful for. My life really needs to stop revolving other people and what's worrying me about them.
When I was 'pursuing' the guy that stabbed me in the back, he was all I could think about and I was in constant jealousy about other girls, it was sickening...
I'm really thankful that I have the ability to live on my own, I have a job, I have good neighbors, a family I can talk to, my art, and that I have John's love. I really need to stop thinking negatively and refresh my mind. I think now that whenever I have negative thoughts, I should bake something...and make it all awesomely pretty, hah.

Anyway, I'm finally getting my butt into painting again. I'm taking a painting class next semester and I really want to do well in it.
I need to work on Lolly! I haven't worked on it ever since I moved out and it's driving me nuts xD

Hope you guys had a good new year! Any resolutions?
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:iconlinkslove:
Its great that you were able to work things out with John. And people do indeed take too many things for granted, and you really don't know what you've got until its gone.

Sounds like things are looking up for you though. :)
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:iconnayru-kaleidoscope:
Mood: Joy ~nayru-kaleidoscope Jan 5, 2011  Professional Digital Artist
YAY JHON's BACK!! , honestly from the years i've been watching you and your art...couldn't believe it either when i read you broke up with him, he seemed alot like your type of man, hope it gets all better now that the two of you are talking again, wishing you both all the best for this year :)
this things that you mention goin on... are all just symbols of growth :) so hang it there whenever its rough, something good always comes out of it...believe it,its true indeed ;)
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:iconprofessor-kirby:
~Professor-Kirby Jan 5, 2011  Hobbyist Photographer
Glad to hear you and John are talking again. c:
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:iconagent505:
*Agent505 Jan 5, 2011  Professional Writer
There are only three people in this world a person can control.

Me, myself, and I.
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:iconblue-nayru:
Negative thinking really does sucks. Something I really have to work on this year (but not necessarily a resolution ;))
And the whole jerk thing I can say I have been in that type of situation before (last year actually @_@. What the hell was I thinking?! *shivers*)

Anyway, good luck with your painting and I look forward to seeing some Lolly work :aww:

And I can see you're listening to Linkin Park xD Nice.
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:iconkaerii:
Aww, I'm sorry! Was the jerk someone you mentioned liking in another journal? I was pretty shocked when I read that you broke up with John. but, it's understandable if you were going through such a rough time. Maybe it was meant to be if you're speaking again? :3
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:iconsage-of-winds:
*Sage-of-Winds Jan 5, 2011  Professional Digital Artist
Yeah, the jerk was the same person in that last journal. Just back stabbed me when I really went out of my own way for him :/
Like I said, there were a lot of things that I was forgetting about John when I broke up with him. He really is worth it...
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:iconkaerii:
Well, make new crazy buff friends and have them... take care of him. xD
Hopefully it all works out in the end, right?
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:iconfoxlightstep:
Woah woah.. wait.. When did you break up with John? I didn't see that in any of your other journals *though admittedly I skipped reading some ^.^' *
I hope he welcomes you back into his life. Things will get better. *hugs*
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:iconsage-of-winds:
*Sage-of-Winds Jan 5, 2011  Professional Digital Artist
Yeah, I wrote a journal about it awhile ago (2 1/2 months?)
Things are getting better for us, he and I do need to heal a wee bit before we majorly step into anything ;)
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